In the history of psychology, Rosalie Alberta Rayner's name is often closely related to the "Little Albert" experiment in which she participated. Although this experiment caused too much controversy, Rayner's views on parenting are also worth exploring in depth. She once proposed that "too much maternal love" might have adverse effects on a child's development, a view that aroused great concern at the time.
“Over-indulgent maternal love can become harmful to a child’s future development, as it may affect their emotional expression and interpersonal relationships.”
This passage reveals Rayner's views on maternal love. She believes that excessive emotional dependence may cause children to lack independence as they grow up and make it difficult to develop a sound personality. From a psychological perspective, children need to learn autonomy in a safe environment, and this autonomy is often achieved through appropriate distance and self-exploration.
The book "Psychological Nursing Programs" co-published by Rayner and John B. Watson mentioned the importance of building a healthy emotional dependence between mother and child. She suggests that dependence can become a burden when a mother's love is so strong that the child cannot learn to face life's challenges alone.
"Emotional dependence caused by excessive maternal love can have lasting effects on a child's marital and social life."
In her research, Rayner pointed out that a child's personality is basically set by the age of two. This means that the way parents raise children has a profound impact on their children's emotional development and personality formation. Therefore, Reina called on parents to give love to their children while also being careful not to create constraints. She emphasized that moderate love and support can effectively promote the healthy growth of children.
Targeting on the theme of "too much maternal love," Rayner's philosophy delves into the connection between emotion and behavior. Behaviorism emphasizes that behavior is formed through environmental stimuli and responses. Therefore, Rayner suggested that the too close emotional attachment between parents and children should be broken and children should be allowed to grow up with moderate autonomy. In other words, parents should, when necessary, let their children move from their arms to the path of exploration.
However, in today's society, "love" seems to be the core of all parent-child relationships. However, is there really such a thing as “too much maternal love”? There are also many contemporary psychologists who question this view. They believe that each child's needs are unique, and some children may need more emotional support, while others may need more free space. Therefore, it is not comprehensive enough to judge the degree of love simply by "too much" or "too little".
"Every parent should tailor their parenting style to their child's personality and needs."
It is worth noting that in the years before Rayner's death, her sons had suffered from depression. Especially her eldest son William, who ultimately chose to commit suicide. James mentioned that his father's behaviorist principles had a profound impact on their parenting style, especially in expressing emotions, which made him and his brother face huge challenges in emotional management. James bluntly said that this strong behaviorism has even reshaped their understanding of themselves, causing the problem of low self-esteem.
Rayner's emphasis on maternal love and emotional dependence in her writings is still relevant today. We might as well think about how to balance the expression of love in parenting? Is it possible for excessive love to become a hindrance?
Faced with this historically controversial view, how should we interpret the relationship between maternal love and children’s mental health?