Book Review: A grammar of power in psychotherapy: Exploring the dynamics of privilege

Abstract

Like a Mother: A Feminist Journey Through the Science and Culture of Pregnancy provides a frank, funny, and factual examination of pregnancy, childbirth, and new motherhood. Unlike traditional guides, like the What to Expect series, Garbes delves deeply by investigating often-neglected topics such as miscarriage, mother’s milk, the placenta, pelvic floor, and postpartum sex. She suggests that a serious disparity exists between perceptions of pregnancy and reality. Citing extensive research from evolutionary biology, physiology, and psychology, Garbes debunks myths and offers gratifying guidance to expectant parents. In Part 1, Garbes investigates pregnancy and uncovers much inaccurate information. Pregnancy resources routinely cite flawed research that bans cheese, deli meat, raw fish, coffee, alcohol, and drugs. She finds this zero tolerance approach futile and urges women to make more informed choices. Further, Garbes asserts that expectant moms rarely learn about the placenta, how we deliver it after birth, and how its function determines the outcome of pregnancy. She then argues that though miscarriages are relatively common, falling down stairs, stress, and lifting heavy objects do not cause them. Chromosomal abnormalities do. Our bodies are smart—they often know when we should not carry a baby to term. Delivery is described in Part 2, as Garbes further refutes common misconceptions. Birth plans rarely work. Only 5% of babies are born on their due date, and scientists do not know what triggers labor. She laments the false binary between a “natural” birth and a C-section and the maternal death rate in the United States, especially for women of color or modest means. Garbes offers the “doula effect” as a possible solution, citing research on happy labors. It does not matter whether the delivery was short and simple or prolonged and painful, mothers claim that the most important thing was steady, nonjudgmental support from someone. Garbes then dissects information on mother’s milk: what it is, how it changes, how it fights sickness, and how it regulates circadian rhythms. Breast milk is miraculous, she tells us. In Part 3, Garbes presents the pros and cons of new parenthood. Her detailed descriptions of postpartum sexual intercourse are hilarious. She wonders why we do not prepare parents for the reality of gruesome, repetitive newborn care, and the loss of our old selves. She cites evidence on marital satisfaction, which typically declines after childbirth; clear negotiation of chores and child-rearing tasks can improve parental relationship quality. Referencing studies on incontinence after labor, Garbes calls for routine postpartum pelvic floor therapy. In addition, emerging science brings promise to postpartum recovery; fetal cells live in our bodies after birth (michrochimerism) and impact mothers’ long-term physical and mental health. Evidence of fetal cells in mothers’ wounds suggests these cells promote healing. Like a Mother offers an enjoyable account of one of our most monumental human experiences and should serve as a required read for every parent. Garbes finds that the feminist movement has provided benefits for many during pregnancy, but persons of color and the poor often have not reaped these gains. New scientific research is often unattainable for the millions who give birth each year. Garbes offers warm advice like a cup of cocoa, delivered by a best friend. She suggests that expectant parents ignore unwelcome advice and judgment and instead embrace unique and inclusive birthing experiences. By putting to bed the myths of perfect pregnancy, delivery, and early parenthood, we welcome more diverse stories.