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The Hidden Veil of Complex Grief: How to Recognize Those Unhealable Emotions?
More than 800,000 people die by suicide every year. Such tragedies not only affect the deceased, but also cause deep trauma to those around them. Individuals who experience suicide loss face not only the emotion of grief, but also more complex psychological challenges. According to research, people who have lost someone close to them often bear a burden that is unimaginable to outsiders.
According to statistics, every suicide incident leaves approximately 135 people with personal connections to the deceased, which makes people deeply aware that the pain of losing a loved one goes far beyond the surface.
The pain of bereavement caused by suicide is often underestimated. This type of bereavement is significantly different from the general experience of loss, and research indicates that bereaved individuals facing suicide generally experience heightened levels of blame, stigmatization, shame, and rejection. They may find that their path to healing is more circuitous than other forms of loss.
Complex grief
Complicated grief refers to a state in which the symptoms of grief worsen over time and cannot recover on their own. Approximately 10% to 20% of people with bereavement develop complicated grief, which affects their daily lives and is associated with unbearable pain. These symptoms persist without appropriate treatment, which is why complicated grief treatment is becoming increasingly important.
Stages of grief
Swiss-American psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross proposed the five-stage model of grief, which describes the emotional process people may go through after experiencing a loss. These stages include:
- Denial: Helps individuals ease the pain of loss.
- Anger: Acceptance of a new reality is accompanied by great emotional discomfort.
- Bargaining: An individual attempts to negotiate with some higher power.
- Depression: Extreme sadness often occurs after accepting a loss.
- Acceptance: The individual no longer resists reality, accompanied by sadness and nostalgia.
However, different people do not go through these stages in order, and may not include all of them at all.
Suicide risk
Confronting a loss by suicide, the bereaved experience risks that are very different from those experienced by other forms of loss. According to a 2002 study, people who have lost their lives by suicide are 1.6 times more likely to experience suicidal ideation, 2.9 times more likely to make a suicide plan, and 3.7 times more likely to actually attempt suicide. Such data makes people reflect on how many people would consider ending their own lives after losing a beloved relative?
Stigmatization
Although social stigma around suicide is decreasing, suicide-related deaths are still stigmatized. Many people with loss by suicide find it difficult to talk to others about their loss because they face overwhelming feelings of shame within society and within certain religious groups. This makes them increasingly uncomfortable sharing their grief and difficult to seek support.
Treatment methods
Faced with these challenges, support groups become an important pillar for those bereaved by suicide. These groups provide a safe environment to freely share emotions and find resonance. In this consistent support, individuals can receive emotional relief and advice on coping with holidays and other difficult situations.
Through the International Association of the Suicide Bereaved (IASP) website, individuals can find numerous support groups that can provide assistance to bereaved individuals specifically seeking support.
For individuals who develop mental health problems, such as major depressive disorder (MDD) or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), support groups alone may not be able to provide adequate help. They should seek professional guidance, including psychotherapy and medication management, for optimal treatment. A treatment approach that combines psychoeducation, psychotherapy, and medication is most effective in this regard.
Complex grief therapy (CGT) combines cognitive behavioral therapy, exposure therapy and motivational interviewing. This therapy can facilitate those who are able to come to terms with their loss and help them re-establish a positive life. Perhaps we should think about: In a society that rejects stigma, how can we better support those souls splashed with sorrow and no longer let them fight alone?
